You spend all day caring for someone else. Who's caring for you?
Nobody prepares you for what caregiving actually feels like. Not the logistics—you figured those out. The medications, the appointments, the insurance calls. It's the emotional weight that nobody talks about.
The guilt when you feel resentful. The grief of watching someone you love change. The loneliness of a life that's shrunk to doctor's offices and medication schedules. The identity you've slowly lost underneath the role of caregiver.
And you can't talk about it. Not really. People say "you're so strong" and "they're lucky to have you," which is kind but shuts down any honest conversation about how hard this is. Admitting you're struggling feels like admitting you don't love the person you're caring for enough.
ILTY doesn't need you to be strong. It doesn't need you to be grateful. It's a place where you can say the things you can't say anywhere else—the exhaustion, the resentment, the grief—without judgment and without consequence.
Guilt is the constant companion of caregiving. Guilt for not doing enough, guilt for wanting a break, guilt for having feelings that aren't purely selfless. Name it and work through it.
You've been so focused on someone else that you've forgotten you have needs too. ILTY helps you reconnect with what you need—not as selfishness, but as sustainability.
The repetitive questions. The thanklessness. The way nobody else in the family steps up. Say it here. No one will judge you or tell you to be grateful.
You're grieving someone who's still here. Watching a parent lose their memory or a partner lose their independence is a slow, ambiguous loss that doesn't fit neat categories.
Caregiving that burns you out helps no one. Talk through what boundaries you need, what help you can ask for, and what has to change before you break.
The sibling who has opinions but doesn't help. The relative who second-guesses every decision. Process the frustration and figure out how to handle it.
We want to be clear about our limitations:
Yes. Resentment doesn't mean you don't love them. It means you're human, you're exhausted, and you've been giving more than you have. The fact that you feel guilty about the resentment already tells you how much you care. Let yourself feel it without making it mean something about your character.
ILTY doesn't require appointments, commutes, or hour-long blocks you don't have. You can talk for five minutes while your loved one naps, or for twenty minutes at 2am when the worry won't stop. It fits around caregiving because it has to—your schedule doesn't bend.
That feeling is important information, not a character flaw. It may mean you need more support, more help from family, or professional respite services. If you're in crisis, please reach out to 988. If it's a slower burn of depletion, ILTY can help you process what's happening and think through what needs to change.
ILTY is free during beta. Start a conversation and see if it helps with what you're going through.